As I sit here trying to muster up the makings of a new post, I can’t help but wonder where this blog is going. Much like a photograph, a blog should have a focal point and at some point, this blog’s focus was lost.
There was a time, which seems like an eternity ago, that I posted regularly and with total enthusiasm. Always finding the humor in the midst of the mundane and a filled glass where most would see (ehem…excuse me,) only backwash. Of course, that’s when life resembled something that looked more to me like normal…or whatever my perception of normal was.
At that time, I (we) were largely defined by the fact that we were homeschoolers. I was a struggling single mother who had opened a bookstore to stay home and homeschool my children, while being the caretaker of a mom with an acquired brain injury. I had spunk and durability, having withstood many an injury to my spirit, I maybe felt a little too good.
But things are different now. So much has happened since then, it would be really hard to nail it down in only one sentence, but since I have resolved to start the new year with transparency and authenticity, there is no time to start like the present.
The overview…I am still a single homeschooling mother, which may or may not be a surprise to those of you who have grown to know me online over the years. I will not go into detail, but it has been an ugly year to say the least. I am recovering from a serious burnout of sorts, I now help care for *two* ailing parents, I finally put my youngest in nursery school to give us some time to regroup; even put an end to a chapter in our lives that needed to come to a quick termination after the closing of the bookstore. This of course is only scratching the surface; however, I will spare you the gory details and hold tight to the fact that we are the mend and only Jesus will bring us through this difficult season.
I have since started a photography business, out of necessity, spent loads of time getting to know my children, and taken more time to nurse my ailing soul, which needed a great deal of nourishment. I have come to realize, when faith is put to the test, there are really only two possible endings.
My point is, I am no longer the same person I was when I started this blog. And therefore, it cannot continue as it was. I have struggled with this fact for sometime; not wanting to stop blogging, but not able to articulate the changes occurring in my life.
But I digress. As time permits I will still continue posting, but my focus will be more about photography. I will still enjoy and freely share more personal things, because first, I want to, and second, I feel that a measure of transparency is needed between a writer and a reader for a personal connection to be made. However, I need to write with a purpose, or writing becomes a task and a burden and I have felt that for long enough.
So there it is…..and it only smarts a little.
Here’s to a joyful New Year.